I Hate but Love
by 100-series
Summary: Rudy, Jack, and Cecilia have been traveling for over a year now. Cecilia has to find a way to balance responsibility and personal freedom. In the midst of this problem, Rudy finds that the growth of Filgaia is negatively affecting one of their friends.
1. Chapter 1

**I Hate But Love**

A fanfiction for Wild Arms Alter Code: F

Summary: Rudy, Jack, and Cecilia have been traveling together for over a year now. Cecilia has to find a way to balance responsibility and personal freedom. In the midst of this problem, Rudy finds that the growth of Filgaia is negatively affecting one of their friends.

**Author's Notes:**

First, this is for Wild Arms Alter Code: F, but I'm pretty sure that it goes with the original Wild Arms just as well. Second, Rudy speaks in this because he isn't a mute. I may take some liberties with his personality due to the fact that he speaks very little in both versions of the game, but hopefully it will not be too far outside of the mark. Third, this contains SPOILERS for the game. Fourth, this will include pairings as I see fit to include them, so if you are sensitive about that then consider yourself warned. Fifth and finally, if you enjoy it, please let me know in a review.

**Chapter One: Breaking up the Band**

(1)

It was well into the second year after the demons attacked Filgaia on one morning when Cecilia found herself sitting in deep recollection at the window of one of their most often frequented inns. Since then, the power of the guardians had strengthened several fold, as could easily be seen in the reappearance of green foliage all over the world. Many of the deserts were now grassy plains, and someday, long after the lives of Rudy, Jack, and Cecilia, they would become lush forests.

Filgaia was recovering from a sickness, healing its own wounds over time. After just a year, the number of evil creatures that once threatened human towns, crops, and animal life alike dwindled. Free now to grow, the rare healing plants and natural animal species burst forth in number. Humans themselves were no exception to the sudden surge of life; babies were born in increased numbers in every town.

Cecilia considered this while watching Port Timney from the second floor of the inn there. It was just before dawn and the town below was still dim and quiet. The ocean was a dark line under the slowly lightening sky. Behind her, the room that she shared with her two friends was just the same. Jack and Rudy never seemed to have trouble sleeping for every moment the option was available, but Cecilia found herself awake early and unable to sleep again fairly often. Hanpan the wind mouse kept her company much of the time, but even he was asleep this morning, curled into a little niche at the back of Jack's head.

Their primary assignment as of that moment was to see to the peaceful growth of Filgaia, but the truth was that this was just a glorified excuse for them to have some sort of path to walk on. The three of them needed to remain partners and any reason beyond that was only a formality. Jack, a man who was attractive enough by all counts, hadn't even bothered with female company that she knew of since they had started out; and Rudy was apparently content as could be as long as he wasn't alone, and he could easily be alone in any crowd without his friends. Cecilia understood that, because she felt that way herself. As for Hanpan, she imagined that the little mouse had shared several pacts such as this one in his long life. She wondered how lonely it must be to be one of such a rare race, but Hanpan never seemed lonely.

Then, as if he sensed her thoughts shifting to him, Hanpan woke up. He stretched his back like a lazy cat might do, and then bounded across the room silently to Cecilia's shoulder. "Up again, princess?" he asked. "Does something bother you?"

"No, nothing bothers me," Cecilia answered quietly, so as not to wake the others.

Hanpan stared at her with scrutiny for a few seconds and then shrugged his little blue mouse shoulders. "Well okay, but don't be afraid to get it all out. I know Jack may be thickheaded sometimes, but Rudy and I are great listeners."

Cecilia smiled and stood up. "Thanks, Hanpan. But this is just normal every so often, especially for girls."

"Oh I see, it's that kind of thing..." Hanpan looked thoughtful for a moment and then bounced back to Jack's bed. Cecilia hoped that attributing her odd behavior to one of the very few things that Hanpan knew little about might keep the questions at bay, and it seemed to have worked.

The sun was coming up now, striking the ocean and illuminating the town. Hanpan hopped onto Jack's shoulder and bounced up and down several times. "Time to get up!" he said. "Cecilia's already ready to go, she even packed her bags!"

"Good for her," Jack groaned as he stretched his arms over his head and got out of bed, letting Hanpan fall off and find somewhere else to sit. He straightened his hair and put on his duster, then headed for the stairs. "I'm taking care of some breakfast first, I'm sure the princess won't disagree."

"I'm with you!" Cecilia agreed wholeheartedly. Whatever funk had gotten into her that morning was instantly gone. "Rudy, are you hungry?"

Rudy was always quick out of bed and stood rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. "Yeah," he agreed, very aware of the fact that Cecilia rarely left anything for latecomers at the table. With that decision made, they all went downstairs.

(2)

After a meal of mushroom omelettes they each had a full stomach, and were ready to set out on their journey. All of their things were brought down to the lobby from the upstairs room. Cecilia hefted her large suitcase, leaning far backwards so that her weight might balance out the heavy lift.

"I don't see why you carry that huge thing," Jack said, as he had several times over the course of their journey. "You never needed all that junk before."

"I don't have to pack light when we're just on a regular kind of journey, right?" she laughed. "If demons attack again, I'll drop it!"

"Let me see," Hanpan said, and jumped across Jack's arm to Cecilia's shoulder. In order to inspect closer, he then perched on the case. Being a wind mouse, he weighed quite possibly _less_ than the proverbial feather, but this was still enough to send Cecilia toppling forward. Rudy lundged out for the case's handle with lightning-fast reaction speed, steadying it, Cecilia, and Hanpan all together just at the last millisecond before disaster.

"Phew!" Hanpan sighed, and chose Rudy's head as his new roosting position. "Either you're lugging more junk than usual, or perhaps you aren't working out quite enough."

Cecilia prepared to say something in reply to that remark, but looked up at Rudy, whose hand along with hers was still on the handle of the case, and the thought left her head completely. Since when did she have to look _up_ at Rudy, anyway? She blinked, and then gave a small yelp, letting the case fall. Apparently the case was too much for Rudy too, and it hit the ground with a thunk. Hanpan abandoned his post for higher ground (Jack) as Rudy nearly fell over thanks to the surprise and the sudden shift in balance.

"Wh-What?" Jack stammered while craning his head around, looking for danger with his hands at his sword ready to fight. Cecilia wasn't reaching for her wand, however. She was staring at Rudy horror-stricken.

"When Rudy stood next to me--" she said, collecting her wits. Her shocked expression turned to a pout.

"Yeah?" the others asked together, looking for the second and hopefully explanatory part of her sentence.

Cecilia's lower lip puffed out in a way that was uncharacteristic of her. "Well, I just realized he was taller than me, that's all."

Jack groaned and slapped himself in the face. "Is that all it was? You hadn't noticed that yet? Geez, you scared us!"

"Has it been like that for a long time?" Cecilia asked urgently.

Hanpan laughed a little and hopped back over to Cecilia. "Don't worry about it," he said, "not everyone's got a bird's eye view, like Jack. I hadn't really noticed either."

"Give me a break," Jack grumbled in response. "You act like I'm a freak of nature. So what's wrong with Rudy being tall, anyway?"

Rudy himself waited patiently for Jack's question to be answered as Cecilia shuffled one foot on the ground in an awkward silence. "Well," she said after some hesitation, "I'm not getting any taller, but I bet Rudy's going to sprout up until he's tall like you, Jack!"

"And that's bad?" Jack spat. "Look, I'm a pretty handsome fellow, if you'd care to notice!"

"I'll get nosebleeds looking up at both of you," Cecilia complained in response.

By that time, Hanpan was chuckling hysterically at all of this. Though it was easy to forget that Hanpan was technically a rodent, that squeaky laughter reminded everyone right away. "Cecilia likes boys to stay short, that's what it is. This must be some kind of princess complex."

"That's right," Jack said, while brushing his chin in thought. "You like to keep a guy below eye-level, don't you?"

"Stop picking on me," Cecilia pleaded, and went to lift her case again while coming up with a classic cover. "For the record, I think you're both very handsome, how is that?" she said in the tone of a mother who wants her boys to stop bickering. Rudy went ahead and laughed at this, hoping it would diffuse the mild discomfort of the situation he was in as the subject of the issue.

"Ha ha, I'm onto you now, Princess," Jack chuckled, though Cecilia doubted that he was onto anything. Then he walked beside her and lifted the case easily by its handle with only one hand. "I'll carry this if you'll get my stuff."

"Thank you," Cecilia smiled. Then Jack dropped everything he had been carrying and she grimaced. There were sleeping bags and canteens and tool kits piled high. "Wait, this isn't a fair trade!"

"Well _fine_," Jack groaned exasperatedly. "Everyone put everything down and we'll split it three ways, totally even! Will that suit you?"

"Yes!" Cecilia answered with a brilliant grin. "That sounds like a great idea!"

(3)

"Let's see if we can still get out of here while the sun's up," Jack muttered as each of them went about unpacking. While Cecilia and Hanpan were preoccupied with examining the contents of her case to see if it could be arranged in a more efficient manner, Jack leaned over Rudy and clapped a heavy hand down on his shoulder. "I'll slip the heavy stuff into our bags," he said quietly, "Just don't let the princess know we're going easy on her or we'll never get out of here."

Rudy agreed to that idea. "Where are we headed to, anyway?" he asked in a voice that was barely above a whisper. They were possibly the quiet boy's first words of the day.

Jack froze in the middle of stealthily filling his and Rudy's packs with heavy items. He raised his palms to either side of his head and gently clapped his skull, obviously frustrated. "Crap, I don't even know!"

Cecilia did overhear this part. "That's right," she laughed, "We haven't even decided on a heading yet. I'm just so used to getting up and moving on to the next place, that I did it this morning out of habit!"

"All right," Jack declared, raising his hand, "I vote we start again tomorrow."

"No, no," Cecilia replied. "We can leave as soon as we finish packing!"

Jack sighed, wondering what the point of all of it was, but going along with it all the same. While they rummaged about doing just that, the inn keeper came to greet the early risers. The middle aged man smiled at his frequent customers, the well-reputed wanderers. "Good morning," he said, distracting Cecilia from her packing efforts. Jack took this as his best opportunity to grab some heavy stuff without her knowing.

"Good morning, sir," she responded politely. "We'll be out of here shortly. Sorry if we're cluttering up your lobby, we can move if it's a problem."

"No problem at all," he said with a smile. "I have a letter for you, though."

Jack looked up attentively along with Rudy as Cecilia responded to that. "Letter?"

"With a royal seal from Adlehyde no less," he said in awe. "You three must rank pretty high among wanderers to receive a job request from such a high place!"

"Yeah," Jack mumbled, noticing how Cecilia reacted to that. She tried to hide it, but he could tell that it upset her for some reason. Understanding others, especially young ladies, wasn't Jack's strong point, but after traveling with Cecilia for so long, he felt like he could at least pick up on something that was bothering her. He looked at Hanpan who shrugged, seeming just as aware but clueless as he was.

"Thank you for passing it along," she replied, and turned to her friends with a forced smile. "Hey guys," she said weakly. "I uh... have a note here from home."

Jack held his arm out to make a bridge as Hanpan hopped from him to Cecilia. "Can we read along, or would you like privacy?" he asked her.

"I'll read it aloud," Cecilia said with a short sigh. Jack looked at Rudy. Even he seemed to detect something.

_Dear Cecilia,_

_I hope that this letter finds you and your friends well. _

_I know that you are enjoying your life out there in the world, but I must ask that you return to Adlehyde as soon as you receive this letter. It is not my wish to end your journey prematurely, but it has been over a year now, and affairs at home are in a turbulent state. Please return as soon as possible, at least to catch up on current events. _

_There are many confidential matters concerning Adlehyde and Filgaia as a whole that I must speak of in person, but issues concerning the welfare of Adlehyde are not the only reasons for my request. Everyone misses you and we would like to see you again. Perhaps you can view this simply as a vacation from your adventures? Your two warrior friends are as welcome here as you are, as saviors of Filgaia._

_Hoping to see you soon,_

_Your Uncle Johan_

There was a silence after the closing of the letter. Cecilia calmly folded it, and stuck it inside her jacket. After taking a deep breath she stood up. "Well," she said, finally. "I guess that means our destination has been made up."

"No big deal," Jack answered with a shrug. "Honestly, it feels like we've been outright avoiding the place. Maybe they need help with something."

Cecilia smiled half-heartedly. It was true that she had been intentionally leading them away from Adlehyde in a subtle manner over the course of their journey. Maybe it was selfish, but she didn't like being in a place where everyone saw her as "Princess."

The inn-keeper had gone about his own business while their group was talking, and was now behind the counter of the front desk. He called to them, breaking yet another lingering silence. "Oh, that's right!" he said. "I forgot to tell you guys... that letter is probably pretty old. The messenger who came said that they'd been sending letters to all of the inns that you probably frequent hoping to get a hold of you. Pretty rough way to do it, but I guess Adlehyde really wants you." He said this last part with pride. Though he was unaware of the fact that Cecilia was a princess, he seemed honored by the fact that such high-class wanderers were known around his inn.

"Thank you again, sir!" Cecilia said, then looked at her party with less enthusiasm. "I guess we need to secure a ship right away. Luckily, I think I heard that Captain Bartholomew is coming into the port today."

"I'm not sure that makes us _lucky_ per say," Jack joked.

Then, Cecilia held her bags out to Rudy. "Trade me," she said.

She received a badly posed innocent expression from him in response. "Ah, what for?"

Cecilia smirked. "They're all the same, right? I mean, even if you are a little taller now, you and Jack wouldn't have filled yours with heavier things, now would you?"

"Busted," Hanpan snickered.

"I swear," Jack groaned, "you try to be nice to a girl these days and it's impossible!"

"Okay, okay," Cecilia laughed. "I'll allow it this once if it'll save us some time, but the condition is you have to let me cook dinner for both of you later."

"What punishment," Jack groaned. "We'll all have indigestion! I'm never going to be a nice guy again!"

"Fine then, Rudy can have it all."

Rudy seemed to like that idea, and Jack quickly changed his tune. "I'm just joking, come on! And Rudy, I'm gonna have to teach you to lie better."

"You folks have a nice trip," the inn keeper said to them as they finally picked up all of their belongings and headed through the door.

"Thanks," Jack answered and waved over his shoulder as he followed Rudy and Cecilia through the door.

(5)

Thanks to their minor packing drama, the sun was already rising in the sky above the town. The streets were lively as everyone started their day. They turned in the direction of the harbor where they planned to catch a boat, Captain Bartholomew's with any luck.

Cecilia drifted off to her own thoughts as she walked along the road with the other two. Normally she liked to enjoy the scenery of the busy port town, and to smell the yummy fragrances coming out of the little cafes and shops serving breakfast. At the moment, however, she was too preoccupied with the letter's meaning. Uncle Johan was a man who knew how to write certain things between the lines. She wondered how it could involve her personally in such an important way. Thinking along that path, she began to wonder if bringing her "warriors" along with her was really a good idea. Why were they emphasized in the letter?

"Whoa!" Jack shouted, breaking Cecilia out of her daze. She had been so "spaced out" as her friends back at the abbey might have said, that she had hardly noticed their passage into the port. The Sweet Candy was in fact docked nearby, and it had dropped off a few passengers of note: Calamity Jane and her butler, Magdalen.

It was Jane who had snuck up on Rudy and shoved him playfully, but hard enough to send him nearly flying off the pier. Jack held him back safely with one hand seizing the back of his collar, and Rudy's arms were still flailing for balance when Cecilia snapped to attention.

"I swear, you're such a light weight!" Jane balked.

"You always act like these things are our fault," Jack said, steadying Rudy and setting him back on the ground. Cecilia giggled at the situation, though.

"What my lady means to say is," Magdalen translated, "Hello, it's so good to see you again."

"Something like that," Jane shrugged. "We've been looking all over for you guys!"

"Actually," Magdalen corrected again, "We were fortunate to find you at our first stop."

"Hey Magdalen!" Jane whined. "You don't have to tell them everything!"

"It's nice seeing you," Cecilia said, smiling. "Have you really been looking for us?"

"Yes, I really have," Jane answered. "I have a message from that idiot who hangs around Saint Centaur." Then she stuck her nose in the air. "Don't ask me why I was there."

Jack raised an eyebrow. "So why _were_ you there?"

"I told you not to ask me!" Jane huffed and stomped her foot. "Well fine," she said and then smirked at Cecilia. "I was there on a mission from Adlehyde."

"Adlehyde hired you to go to Saint Centaur for some reason?" Cecilia asked her.

"Yes, to scope out the place for housing opportunities, or something like that. Whatever, it's a job."

Jack frowned, confused. "But Adlehyde and Saint Centaur are way apart, what's the deal?"

"I don't know! Why are you asking me?" Jane grumbled.

"What did Zed say?" Rudy asked her. "Was it important?"

"I dunno," Jane answered him, and then began to imitate someone who is in a great deal of agony. "_Help me, I'm dying_! or something like that."

"What?" Cecilia gasped. The mystery of Jane's deployment by Adlehyde was suddenly the farthest thing from her mind. "Is he in some kind of trouble?"

"The guy was sick is all that I could tell," Jane shrugged. "The blind girl said you guys might be able to help."

Jack stared at her in disbelief. "You don't have anything else to go on? Just that Zed's sick and that Aura wants to see us about it?"

Jane scrunched her nose up in distaste. "It's not like they could pay me, so honestly, you're lucky that I care enough to stop and look for you guys!"

"I'm glad that you found us," Cecilia said gratefully. "Thank you, Jane. We'll ship out to Saint Centaur immediately."

"But wait," Jack sighed. "We already had a previous engagement, remember?"

"Oh, that's right," Cecilia said, remembering the letter. She must have been subconsciously trying to forget about it. "Adlehyde needs me for something..."

"Well shucks," Jane said sarcastically and laughed. "I guess Zed is going to die."

Rudy frowned at her bad joke. "We can't leave him..."

"Why not?" Jack shrugged. "I'm sure whatever it is, he can take care of it himself."

"But he's a friend of ours," Cecilia said, siding with Rudy. "Even I will admit he is annoying at times, but we can't leave him when he needs us."

"If he's actually _asking_ for our help," Hanpan noted, "the situation must be serious. That guy has such an ego."

"But Adlehyde needs us too," Rudy added, obviously torn on the situation.

Cecilia nodded in agreement and then took a deep breath. "Well," she said, finally. "It looks like I won't be going to Saint Centaur right away."

"You do mean _we_ won't be going, right?" Jack said. "A trip back to Adlehyde is no big deal, you know. Zed can wait a while."

Cecilia waved her hands in front of herself to give the impression that this was no big deal. "Oh no," she said. "I know my Uncle Johan probably just wants me to show up for about a month or so, maybe go to a few public events to show everyone that Princess Cecilia is still around, then I'll be free to come back. You would be bored out of your mind anyway."

"You don't need to go completely _alone_," Rudy argued.

"Yeah," Jack said. "There's a lot of us, we don't _all_ have to go to Saint Centaur."

Cecilia gave them a warm but teasing smile. "You two didn't have any trouble going places without me before, as I remember."

"Well that was then and this is now!" Jack argued. Cecilia was taken back by how much the insinuation seemed to bother him.

Jane folded her arms crossly. "Geez, you know I'm about to go back to Adlehyde too, and nobody's begging me to stay!"

"I wonder why," Jack mumbled under his breath.

Rudy responded in a more sensitive manner. "I'm sorry Jane," he said. "I would like it if you would come with us more often."

"In that case," Jane said. "I _will_ come with you!"

Jack shoved Rudy in the shoulder. "Great, now you've invited her!"

"Come on, now!" Jane nagged him, and then winked playfully. "If I'm with you, then Cecilia won't have to worry about her boys being up to no good."

"In other words," Hanpan said, "You mean Jack won't be getting Rudy into trouble."

"Right," Jane said. "And I'll loan Magdalen to Cecilia so that he can report to Adlehyde for me and get our reward."

Magdalen smiled slightly and nodded. "If you wish," he said in a tired voice, but Cecilia could tell that he was happy that Jane would be going on with her friends.

"That is," Jane said, "Unless you already have more butlers than you know what to do with, Princess."

Cecilia laughed at that; she knew that Jane was out to get under her skin, but she actually liked the idea of Rudy and Jack heading on without her this time. Issues at home could be uncomfortable to say the least. "Oh no, I appreciate it, Jane."

"Well this seems a bit uneven," Hanpan said. "You know what? Why don't I go with Cecilia, too. That'll make us square."

"Good idea, old pal," Jack said, holding his arm out so that Hanpan could easily jump over to Cecilia. "You know I'd normally be offended to hand my partner over like this, but since it's Cecilia, it's no big deal."

"Thank you," Cecilia answered happily as Hanpan hopped up to her head. Of all of their companions, Hanpan would probably be the most useful in this particular situation.

"After we're finished in Saint Centaur," Rudy said, "we'll just come back to Adlehyde."

"I uh," Cecilia said, sounding sheepish suddenly. "I could meet you there, or somewhere in between... you can take your time, you know..."

Jack put his hands on his hips to show that he was fed up. "Okay Princess, what the heck is going on?"

"Nothing," Cecilia responded with a forced smile that was more than a little suspicious. "I just figured that since we wouldn't see much of each other anyway, you might as well head out to see Zed and Aura, right? We haven't looked in on them in a long time. Besides... you guys might enjoy having a break from me." Though she laughed as she said it, no one smiled.

Rudy frowned and took a step closer to Cecilia. His expression was one of deep concern. "A break from you?" he repeated. "Why would you think that?"

That wasn't quite the response she had been looking for. "I mean, well..."

"We will meet you in Adlehyde as soon as we're done," Jack promised, and it almost sounded like a command. "This team isn't breaking up any time soon."

"Oh dear," Hanpan said in a humorous tone, and leaned over to look into Cecilia's eyes from his position perched atop her head. "I think you might have hurt poor Jack's sensitive feelings talking like that!" Instantly Jack's open palm swept out, knocking Hanpan off with a little mouse yelp. Cecilia caught him easily in her arms. She rocked him tenderly like one might with an infant, and he did not object to this coddling behavior, though Jack balked at it.

"Hanpan and I will go with Madelen to Adlehyde," Cecilia said, while unintentionally hugging Hanpan a little too tightly. "Jane will go with Rudy and Jack to Saint Centaur."

"That sums it up!" Jane said, and grabbed Rudy forcefully by the arm. "And since the Sweet Candy is the only ship that goes there anymore, we'll be boarding now."

Rudy struggled against the girl dragging him away. "Now wait a minute, Cecilia..."

Cecilia waved, and was grateful that Jane was making their parting a rather quick one. Even if it was temporary, it was hard. After realizing that their places in the world were somehow side-by-side, it was harder to split up than it had been before. "Goodbye, Rudy!" she said. "And Jack, you be careful!"

"Why do I need to be careful?" Jack laughed as he turned after the younger members of his team. "See you soon, Princess."

Cecilia faced her new traveling companion. "Thank you for coming with me, Magdalen," she said.

The tall silver-haired man bowed slightly. "It's nothing at all, my lady," he said. "It is on my way, after all."

Cecilia blinked. It had been along time since anyone referred to her in such a formal manner. "Ah, I'm not really your lady, that's Jane..."

Magdalen made a smile that veiled even more humor underneath. "And yet she has lent me out to you, and so for the time being, I suppose that you are."

"Come on," Hanpan said, "She didn't mean it _that_ way."

"I know," he answered. "The way she pretends amuses me greatly."

Cecilia smiled and glanced back at the other three, who were already having some kind of argument after Jane tripped on the plank up to the boat's entrance and was blaming it on Rudy. "It is kind of amusing," she agreed.

"You should be careful not to pick up such a bad habit, Miss Cecilia," Magdelen said.

Cecilia turned towards the other ships in the harbor and wondered which ones might be headed towards Adlehyde. "Unfortunately, a trip to Adlehyde Castle means a great deal of pretending."


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2: Wh-what? Zed's Dilemma**

(1)

There was one single survivor still left in the city of Saint Centaur. Those few who had not been "spirited away" for experimentation by Alhazad had fled far and wide in fear. Only a single blind girl had been passed over, hidden in a secret compartment. Now, even after a year had passed, the solitary girl waited for her neighbors to return to their homes. Despite all of her heartfelt prayers, they had yet to reappear. She had never cursed her fate when it came to this unfortunate situation, just as she had never wasted tears over her sightless eyes. Her positive outlook only changed on a certain day when she realized that a person whom she cared for was in need of help that she could not provide.

The sickness was just a joke when he started to sneeze. At first it had been funny just like everything else that Zed did, and nothing to worry about. He sneezed with such a dramatic flair that it made her laugh. Then the coughing started, deep gritty coughs that scraped the inside of his chest. Then Zed's perpetual energy waned, and that is what really made her concerned.

If Zed got sick, it was Aura who would care for him, and Aura could not see, nor did she have any medical knowledge. She could insist that he sleep and drink as much as possible and eat healthy foods, but he was not human to complicate matters. There was nothing that she could do to help him, and this time she found it impossible to sit by and wait, hoping for the best.

She had to find help while there was still time, but who in the world would want to help a demon even if they knew how? Rudy and the others, they could help; but they were wanderers and the task of finding them would be difficult. There was no one in Saint Centaur who could carry a message. She was able to keep a cool head and hide her worries well enough from Zed, but they were there and they ate at her spirit just as a physical ailment was eating away at Zed.

It was after a few weeks of Zed's deteriorating health, which he fervently denied and tried to disguise altogether, that a wanderer named Jane appeared in Saint Centaur. Aura recognized her as one of Rudy's friends, and would have welcomed her just as warmly if not. It was finally some kind of answer to Aura's many prayers.

Jane explained that she and her partner Magdalen had been sent from Adlehyde to investigate the possibility of people from Adlehyde coming to inhabit the silent, abandoned town.Aura didn't know how to feel about this news. If people would come, it would mean that she wouldn't be alone anymore. On the other hand, the people of Saint Centaur could always come back someday, and it was also important to note that she wasn't exactly alone. She didn't want to think about the idea of Zed being run out of town by people who were just as new here as he was. With Zed being sick, he would be in an even worse situation.

Zed tried to hide his sickness from Jane too out of pride, but unlike Aura, Jane was never one to hold back. Aura could tell from her voice that she had a big heart full of care for others, one that she tried to hide under an aggressive personality. She sounded disgusted by the very idea of helping Zed, but then she pushed him into bed and told him to shut up and that she'd get Rudy right away. Rudy was different from humans too, but he had gotten over sickness before. Rudy would be able to figure him out, probably. Maybe. That's what they hoped.

Aura continued to pray for Zed and everyone else, because it was all that she could do.

(2)

Jane kept to her promise and returned with Rudy and Jack as quickly as possible, sans Magdalen, Cecilia, and Hanpan. It was a few days' travel from Port Timney to Saint Centaur, including the boat ride and the walk over land from the shore to the town. They reached the barrier gate by mid-afternoon. The sun was shining brightly and casting sharp shadows in the abandoned town.

"So what happened here, anyway?" Jane asked, walking backwards and looking back at them. The silence of Saint Centaur spooked her the last time she was here and it was still creepy the second time, though she wanted to make sure that Rudy and Jack wouldn't find out about that.

"Well," Jack began, "It was right after that whole Caging Tower incident where we first ran into you, actually. We were trapped, as I'm sure you remember, and by the time we got out, everybody had vanished all except for the one girl."

"I feel sorry for that girl!" Jane cried. "Here all by herself, and even worse--with Zed!"

"She's got my sympathies as well," Jack agreed.

Jane honestly had no idea why she had been called out to this place like some kind of real estate agent, but it didn't matter to her. She figured that the last that would come of it is that Aura would have some real people to talk to. She wondered why the girl hadn't skipped out of town already as it was. She couldn't imagine being stuck here, especially with Zed. Were some girls so dependent on the strong that they would lower their standards so far?

That reminded her of Cecilia's sudden willingness to break away from her usual teammates and how it had surprised her. She told herself that the entire tearful parting was a ploy the princess was faking, but she knew that it was not the case. It hurt her a bit to admit it, but Cecilia did not have to try very hard to get people to care about her. Even Jane liked her, and that was frustrating. The idea that maybe Cecilia felt unloved from time to time was something that she couldn't imagine.

(3)

The three of them went to the house where Aura stayed within the protection of the barrier around the town. Soon it seemed that even this preventive measure would not be needed, as monsters in Filgaia were on the decline.

Rudy knocked and was greeted by Aura, who could not see them, but knew who it was without having to guess. "I'm so glad you are here," she said with the usual passive enthusiasm. "Please come inside."

"Thanks," Rudy replied, and led the others in. He looked around the house as if he had never been inside of it before. It was dim in the cottage though the sun outside was bright. He scanned the area and then met eyes with Jack, who seemed equally on edge. He glanced back to Jane and shrugged, but he got the feeling that she felt it too. The feeling of death and decay permeating the air was startling.

They followed Aura up a narrow set of stairs as she made her way to the upper floor where the bedrooms were. Her golden hair and white dress made her appear ghostly in the shadowy corridor. It was too quiet there, definitely too quiet for any place where Zed was taking up residence.

Rudy entered the bedroom and found a set of beds. In one was a frail form completely covered in blankets that seemed lacking any breath of life to him. "Here he is," Aura said sadly.

"Yeesh," Jack winced, staying well behind Rudy. "Is he deformed or something?"

Rudy looked to Jane to ask if that was the case, and Jane looked back, just as confused as he was. Aura replied by pulling back the blankets. All three jumped slightly, but unless Zed had magically transformed into cleverly-shaped pile of pillows, he wasn't there at all.

"You'd attack a guy while he's sleeping would you?" Zed exclaimed loudly, and leapt out from behind the door they had entered from. He was fully dressed, including his orange scarf, and stood holding his sword at the ready. "Cowards! Well, I've been here ready and waiting for you! Let's go!"

Everyone groaned, including Aura.

"Zed," Jack aighed. "Believe it or not, our primary goal in life is not to pick fights with you."

Zed dropped his arms to his sides and looked woefully disappointed. "Oh," he said, "Well, what else could you want?"

"What do we want?" Jane repeated in disbelief and anger. She balled her fists up and stamped one foot on the wooden floor. "You told me to go get them yourself, you idiot!"

"Jane tells us that you are sick," Rudy explained calmly.

Zed pointed his finger furiously at Jane. "Well then, she's been spreading dirty lies!" he shouted accusingly. "The great Zed never gets sick! I'm not weak like you human beings, I--!" then he cut off suddenly and began coughing like an old man with asthma. He coughed and wheezed several times until the others were afraid he might hack up a lung, and then stopped just as abruptly. "Just clearing my throat," he said. "Now where was I?"

"Zed, please," Aura chided him softly. She crossed the room to where he stood, then looked at Jack and Rudy in turn with her sightless eyes. Rudy saw the depth of her concern, and knowing how calm and collected she normally was, it proved that something really was wrong. "He is ill, but I don't know what affliction he has or how I should treat it."

"Okay," Jack said willingly enough, "You could start by telling us what exactly is the matter with him."

Aura nodded and felt out for Zed's right hand. Zed shunned away from her at first, resembling a small child resisting a nasty boo-boo inspection from his mother. Then he found that he couldn't push her in good conscience and just turned his head to the side in an angst-ridden fit as Aura slid the glove off of his right hand. "He hid this from me for quite a while," she said, holding his bare forearm up. "If only I could see, maybe I could take better care of him..."

The others saw with their eyes what Aura could only detect from the sheer pain that must be throbbing through Zed's body. It was a horrible sore that appeared to be spreading up the rest of his arm under his sleeve. It was purple and shiny with the mithril liquid which pulsed through demons' veins.

Jane recoiled in disgust. "Egad!" she cried, raising both hands in front of her face dramatically. "What the heck have you been doing with that arm?"

"Is that contagious?" was Jack's first and only question. Rudy lightly smacked himself in the forehead in dismay at both of these insensitive reactions.

Zed snapped his hand back and covered it again quickly. "Okay, so I have some kind of infection, probably," Zed said. "You don't have to call the army about it."

"That looks serious," Rudy said quietly. Though his own body was disguised to look and feel much more like a human's, he found the look of the sore familiar. When he had been wounded deeply enough, the same sort of flesh was visible.

"Okay," Jack said. "Zed old pal, I'm no doctor, but I'd say that's a problem that needs to be seen to as soon as possible."

Aura nodded calmly. "I thought that all of you might know something more than I do."

"Hardly," Jack replied. "I mean, Rudy has a similar body, and we had to go to another dimension entirely to get him healed up, and at great risk and expense. I don't think we could do it again even if it happened to Rudy."

Zed grimaced and crossed his arms. "Sure, if it were to happen to _him_, we would all care. Who cares about poor Zed?"

"I thought you were the one saying you weren't even sick!" Jane retorted and threatened to stomp on his foot.

Zed dashed behind Aura to where he was safe. "No, I'm not bed-ridden or anything," Zed said. "Just a cough and a sore, you see? Heheh... I can still best any of you!"

"You aren't bedridden yet," Aura clarified, "but I am afraid that you will be very soon. You've already been sleeping much more than normally, as if your body just can't hold onto any energy."

"Strange," Jack said. "Zed's never lacking in energy, that much is true. Unfortunately, neither me or Rudy is an expert on this."

Aura's head lowered as her hopes for a simple solution were dashed. This only lasted shortly until Zed began coughing sporadically again. He turned and tried to suppress it to save face, but lost the fight. "I'm uh," he said between coughing and wheezing, "I'm just gonna sit down if that's okay with everybody. It doesn't mean I'm sick or anything."

"Oh, shut up, you moron!" Jane said and shoved Zed forcefully so that he landed in a chair. "You're causing us enough trouble as it is without making yourself sicker, don't you think?"

"I'll get you something warm to drink," Aura said to Zed, then smiled at them all. "I'll get some for all of you." She turned out of the room and down the stairs on her way to the kitchen, leaving Zed with their friends.

"Okay, here's the deal," Zed said in a low tone once she was gone, being uncharacteristically frank. "I know I'm sick as a dog, a dog after a visit to Uncle Alhazad's in fact, but Aura doesn't know that, so just play it cool guys, okay?"

"I think Aura knows better than you do, you fool," Jack berated him. "And there's nothing we can do about this, either. You're in a bad spot, do you realize that?"

"Where's your sorceress girl and the chubby mouse?" Zed asked, craning his neck to be certain they weren't hiding anywhere. "I should think those two would be more useful in this sort of situation!"

"You're right," Jack agreed grudgingly, "Cecilia might have a better chance of guessing what's the matter with you, but she was called away. You caught us in the middle of something important, you know? And Hanpan went with her because from what little you told us, we thought all you had was the mumps or something!"

"I think that this might be out of the range of even your wind mouse's knowledge," Jane said. "My father might know a little, but he really deals in ARMs more than other ancient technology."

"Doctor Emma is a specialist in that area isn't she?" Rudy asked them. "Why not visit her? We are on our way back to Adlehyde after all."

"Great idea!" Jane agreed. "Okay Zed, pack some bags or whatever it is you do."

Zed crossed his arms over his chest in his typical pose. "Hey, I haven't decided to accept your help just yet!" Each of them looked at him in disbelief for a brief pause. Then Zed smiled and nodded his head. "Worry not, Zed will accept your offer of assistance. Thank you for joining my party!"

"We are not in your party," Jane argued, "you are in _our_ party, and you should be damned glad for the opportunity!"

"Does it matter?" Jack grumbled while rubbing his head like a headache was forming there. "Let's just get out of here before we end up having to stay overnight. We'll have to tell Aura that we pass on the tea."

(4)

Downstairs, Aura was nearly finished (cooking was not easy for her, but tea was something that she learned to manage) when she sensed the others coming back down. "Are you all planning to leave right away?" she asked them without turning her head. There was a sad but hopeful tone in her voice.

"Yeah," Jack answered. "Sorry, but the sooner we get out of here, the sooner we can get Zed patched up."

"We'll bring him back as soon as we can," Rudy explained.

"I understand," Aura said. "Zed, would you come here for a second?"

Zed, who had fallen into another coughing fit, stepped forward into the kitchen. "What is it?"

Aura smiled. "In the pantry up there is a thermos bottle," she said. "Would you get it for me?"

"Will do!" Zed agreed, very proud of his ability to reach high places, no doubt. He retrieved the canister and set it in front of Aura.

Aura lifted the teapot and felt for the rim of the thermos. Then she poured the liquid inside. "Take it with you," she said.

"Ah, you didn't have to do that," Zed said bashfully. Then it was Jack who coughed, and not because he was sick. Zed shook his head clear and then took the thermos. After tightly screwing on the lid and throwing it over his shoulder, he turned to the others. "Move out!" he said. "The Z-Gang is on the move!"

"We are _not_ the Z-Gang," Jack grumbled, and left willingly. He walked all the way to the door and through it without looking back. Jane followed after him, just as glad to put Zed behind her, even if it was only in their lineup. Rudy waited, hoping to keep Zed at the center of their formation.

As Zed began to pass through the door, Aura grabbed Zed by his long orange scarf. The lanky ex-demon nearly fell over backwards, though her grip was very gentle.

"Be good," she said, and then kissed his cheek without any hesitation or embarrassment as if this were the most natural thing in the world.

Zed, incapable of blushing as it turned out, turned a nice tint of green to match his hair. "Don't tell Zed to be good! I'm a respectfully bad guy!" Then she raised a questioning brow to him and he corrected himself, "Bad in the best sense of course... I'll just stop by the doc's and get myself patched up, I'll be back in no time." He put his hands on his hips and laughed uproariously. "Zed is mighty and invincible! Silly girl..."

"What is that idiot doing?" Jack called back from outside where he and Jane were already waiting. "Hey, hurry up!"

Zed was still flustered and pushed his way past Rudy and out of the little home. "Time's a wasting!" he shouted at all of them in a voice that sounded painfully hoarse. Rudy found himself intensely curious with the entire exchange.

"Bye," he said, and gave an apologetic smile to Aura before following after his friends. He knew that she couldn't see it, but must have felt it, because she smiled back as if to say this behavior was normal and she liked Zed for it.

(5)

The foursome then began to walk out of Saint Centaur. Jack, at the front, shoved his hands into his pockets and sighed as they passed through the barrier, keeping Zed close enough that he could pass through by association. Nothing zapped Zed, and Jack was glad, no matter how amusing it would have been. The guy was clearly in poor health despite all of his antics. That much was obvious, even without seeing the huge sore festering on his arm.

Jack was also concerned about running around with a demon in their party. He held no more against Zed for that than he did Rudy, at least not anymore. By protecting the blind girl for all of this time, Zed had shown that he was as decent as any human being, probably more than several that Jack knew. The problem was that the rest of Filgaia might not see it that way. Unlike Rudy, Zed was most obviously a demon at the first glance.

"You should get a cloak or something," Jack said. "We have enough problems without people throwing rocks at you."

"Can it be orange?" Zed asked hopefully, totally looking over the potential threat of projectile rocks.

"That's not very inconspicuous," Jack argued back.

Zed pointed a finger at Jane. "She gets to wear orange!"

"That's because she's not a demon!" Jack groaned in response.

"You can have mine," Rudy said, and held out his own cloak. "It's... _almost_ orange..."

"No it's not, that's light brown!" Zed complained, without uttering a thank you.

"Can't you at least be grateful?" Jane nagged, and kicked him in the rear. "Really!"

"Hey!" Jack snapped at her. "Look, he's already falling apart, we don't need you kicking him on top of that. Something could fall off."

"Yes _sir_," Jane feigned obedience innocently, then as soon as Jack turned around, she kicked him. Zed laughed at his fellow kick-victim, even though it was him who Jack had been defending.

"I'm already getting tired of being the chaperone on this youth expedition," he sighed, and couldn't wait to drop off their additional party members, not to mention regroup with their usual ones.

(6)

Rudy dragged behind the other three as they continued to play-fight on their way out of town and wished very strongly that Cecilia and Hanpan could magically appear and join them. He wasn't very good at mediating arguments. Zed and Jane were both argumentative, and Jack was having about as much luck with them as a babysitter on some rowdy children. At least the story would be funnier retold to Cecilia later than it appeared to him presently.

That led him to wonder what Cecilia was doing right at that moment, and the thought occurred to him that she may be in an even more unpleasant situation. At least he was free to do and say what he wanted and to be with his friends. As he wished that there was something they could do to make things easier for her, he failed to notice Jack looking back at him as they walked.

"Are you okay?" he asked. "I hadn't thought of this, but whatever's affecting Zed could possibly infect you too, do ya think?"

"I'm fine," Rudy replied, unable to keep from smiling a little at Jack's concern. "Just thinking."

"I'm glad one of us is," Jack replied. "This whole predicament reeks of stupid."

Rudy laughed at the joke but didn't feel any better as they went on their way. By nightfall they made it back to the Sweet Candy with very little trouble. They encountered no monsters on the way. Unfortunately, the walk alone had Zed winded and almost unable to speak. Almost. Zed would probably never stop talking altogether until he stopped breathing for good. His breath was short and he began to stop every so often to catch his breath. No one chided him in these cases. They all played in argument, but they each could easily see that Zed was working as hard as he could to avoid being a burden to them.

Once they boarded the ship, Rudy led Zed to a room where he could lay down on one of the bunks and recover. Jack was eager for a break from "the kids" by then, and stayed on the deck where the night air was cool. Jane could also be found up there, having the men of the Sweet Candy do her bidding (not that she really needed any bidding done, it was just a fun thing for her to do). Rudy felt that someone should probably stay with Zed, and volunteered himself since anyone else might make him sicker in the long run.

Zed laid on a bed in their room with his arms crossed over his chest, looking absolutely furious with his own condition. All of that jumping and play-acting to cover up the fact was no longer possible. Rudy watched from a chair as Zed didn't sleep, but just laid quietly.

"Are you having trouble sleeping with me here?" he asked Zed.

He got a nasty look in response. "You act so concerned with my health," he said in a spiteful tone. Rudy just sighed and didn't bother to explain himself. Zed dropped the act and went on. "The truth is that demons don't really need sleep," he said. "I have been sleeping often lately, but that just goes to show that there's something wrong with me."

"What do you think it is?" Rudy asked.

Zed sat up straight in the bed and leaned his back against the wall so that he could relax and face Rudy at the same time. He seemed to be trying very hard not to seem friendly, and Rudy was willing to let him go right ahead if it would make him feel better. "It's not a cold or an infection or the flu," he rambled. "I don't really know, but I feel really... sort of like when we fell into that dimension at the gate generator and got spit out. Like I am being erased. Yes, it's like Filgaia's gotten out its big rubber eraser and is just rubbing Zed out for no good reason!"

Rudy smiled at that analogy, but wasn't smiling on the inside because it seemed very true. "I'm sure that Doctor Emma will know something," he said, trying to reassure him. "She helped me when I was sick.. although I don't remember it much."

Zed raised one eyebrow curiously. "And you're some kind of demon machine, right?"

Rudy hadn't actually heard it put that bluntly before. Cecilia and Jack had always been tender around the subject, but not Zed. Cecilia had always said _Rudy is Rudy_ but there was still that fact nevertheless. "Yeah," Rudy replied finally.

Zed seemed confused by that reaction scratched his head, puzzled. Rudy wondered if Zed had assumed that to be a compliment, he seemed to think that being robotic was a good deal. "Well hey," he said. "That means we're kind of almost related, right?"

Rudy raised his chin again, astonished. "Are you trying to say... that maybe you and I... are like brothers?"

Zed frowned so hard that Rudy was sure it would stay stuck that way. "You don't have to go that far! I don't have _that_ much in common with you. I don't see _you_ getting sick."

Rudy had no response for that and sat quietly for a few minutes. These passed in a silence that Zed filled by tapping his fingers against his crossed arms. Rudy thought it best to change the subject. "What you have... It seems really nice," he said, and then paused to think of how to phrase the next part. Zed took it as the entire sentence.

"You think me being sick is nice?"

"N-no," Rudy answered, shaking his head and holding his hands up defensively. "I was going to say about Aura... she really cares about you."

"You've got friends running out your ears," Zed said in annoyance. "You would know better than me."

Rudy stared at him quizzically for a moment, then looked up at nothing. "_Is_ it nice?" he asked. "A girl saying goodbye like that..."

"No, it's absolutely gross and disgusting," Zed snapped back at him. Rudy couldn't tell if he was being sarcastic, trying to fake disinterest, or being seriously honest.

He laughed awkwardly and wished he hadn't said anything. "I just thought it might be, sorry. Just asking. I do have friends, but no one like that..." Rudy thought back to his own experiences. When Cecilia left she hardly even said goodbye, just a short wave. Of course, Jane had been dragging him away, but she also had a tendency to just skip off without warning at any moment. Jane would just say _Well, I'm off!_ and they'd not see her for weeks or even months. He wondered if either of them knew how much he wished that they wouldn't leave.

Before anything else could go wrong conversationally, Jane suddenly burst into the room with nearly enough force to bust the door down. She wore a huge grin on her face and two of the sailors followed behind her carrying trays piled high with food. "Eat up!" she greeted both of them. "Courtesy of the captain, of course."

"I bet," said Jack, whose voice could be heard from down the hallway. He walked up to one of Jane's temporary servants and shoved a fistful of fish sticks in his mouth.

"Hey, nobody invited you!" Jane complained, though she showed no sign of real objection. "Get your own loyal subjects!"

"Eh," Jack shrugged, and sat on the edge of one of the beds next to the chair that Rudy was in. "When all female crews start sailing the high seas, I'll be your arch nemesis. Until then, I'll have to admit that you have the crew whipped. Congrats, Calamity."

"Hey, don't call me that!"

They went on arguing until eventually Zed pitched in and the room which had just been awkwardly silent was loud and full of activity. Rudy relaxed, took some fish sandwiches, and prepared himself for a long trip to Adlehyde.


End file.
